Heartburn depression,
A pain that's not physical,
But irreplaceable, and irresolvable.
The words you speak are incomprehensible
Invariable, unbearable.
And now we fear the teacher.
We fear the untrue preacher,
And trust none to test us on trust,
Because we know of your deceptions
The unsuspecting suspicion.
I was the learner,
I learnt the hard way.
Gave my consent,
Of what I thought he might have meant,
His money being all but spent,
And my life on the line,
But that was all fine with me.
Deception unethics
We'll devise a better method
To deceive you
To lie to you
To test if you can come through
The statistics say you do
Comfort for each other,
Around me your arms
And around you mine
To shield us from a world
Of hurt and harm.
If you'll be my light,
Could I be yours?
If only sometimes
Maybe just half a night
Maybe just what's right?
Simple life,
Like love is here,
That keeps us safe
From fear, from complex
Days and nights
And the time,
When all stars will shine
And the moon be yours
Your light be mine
There is no sign.
For us to know when,
Finally we can begin
Together she knows
Inside there's a place
Our love only grows.
He looked into the mirror
At the face his silhouette
But blinded by the light
That cast out his shadow
He thought of things that were
And wished he could forget
But could not think of things that are
And things still left to happen yet
She looked into the mirror
The mirror looked at her
And saw the perfect girl before
Looking into its own eyes
She couldn't see the imperfections
But only the disguise
Couldn't see the truth inside
But too clearly see the lies
He looked into the mirror
And saw the wall returned
His aged glasses he would wear
Hovering just in mid air
Invisible to the world he'd tell,
Invisible to himself as w
When the sax played,
And its melody washed over me,
And swished my drink around its glass,
Swallowing sorrow of dejection.
The degradation and rejection,
So blunt against the sharp drinks,
That I use to keep it buried deep,
Deep where the melody can reach.
Ah, and all those things that really
Wasn't expected from me.
Let the piano man play, I say
Because after all,
There's someone for everyone isn't there,
And my music's just for me.
And the sound through my ears,
Turned up.
And when the sax played,
I shivered inside I remember,
All those cold nights when the wind blew,
And the dark night alone of December.
But I worked
My world has built itself around,
A girl my heart has found,
A sanctuary inside myself
Around myself, I hide myself.
Holding what delicate pieces
My temple built on sand,
Whilst my helplessness increases,
It's so hard for you to understand.
One movement in the wrong direction,
Sends me spiralling round and down,
Round and down.
Round and down.
Round and down.
My love forever increases,
And it's so hard for you to understand,
Whilst I'm spiralling around,
My feet, barely off the ground.
When I hear your love so preciously,
Whispered that it calls for me!
Yet and yet and woe and yet,
Oh how, oh why, oh how could I forget,
Walked by the sea,
In my dream the other day,
Kept my head stayed asleep,
Knew no other way.
I wanted to jump in,
Lose myself and call out,
I wanted to forget about waking,
I wanted to scream and shout.
But I kept my head,
And stayed away,
From that edge that falls,
Falls, to another time of day.
I dreamt the other day
I waked by the sea.
But this time as I lay awake,
You were sleeping, there, beside me.
I slept the other day.
Something not done in months, it seems,
I never wanted to wake to the world,
Just stay floating in my dreams.
I watch them scream past me,
Blasting in my face their fowl breath
Their stinking black putridity
And their flashy lights, the blinding sights,
The occasional noise to break the silence
Of the nights that they think they possess.
But less is the truth, an eye for a tooth
They skim past me and oh yes, a curse,
A curse on any who ignore my outstretched
Fist, shaking in the air – thumb to crown all,
Only to fall once again with annoyance,
For it is surely most tragic greed,
These people feel the urgent need to occupy
Every space, every little place, as they
Fly forever, speeding by.
Everything I ever knew,
Will end without my say.
All those people without a clue,
Will never find their way.
Life is pointless without a cause,
So why do you still live?
Like snow, all will melt even the sun thaws,
And what did you ever give?
Don't hand out sympathy,
As I hang out the window,
This is just how life will be,
When I jump and go.
There are so many pointless questions,
Is there a God at all?
It doesn't even deserve a mention,
As I watch the world. And fall.
Will I ever hit the ground?
Another stupid flaw,
With a creation that was never sound,
I hear gravity call.
I know in my own heart,
The world is hitting me
She makes my life bearable,
More so, unbelievable,
She's absolutely wonderful
My girl comes from above.
At night I love to listen,
To her voice of bliss, an
See smooth, gold hair glisten,
My girl, she is a dove.
The lights, switched to dim,
Conceal the fumbling from within,
As they lay there, She and Him,
Doing things undreamed of…
Slender body, beauty hips,
Ambrosia for luscious lips,
Playing lips to unknown scripts,
My girl, I am in love.
She's Fire
Scarlet hot.
When is she not?
Sweet as ever, tasting always
Forbidden hallways.
Lips of love, perfect unison of tongue
And lip. Tongue. Lip. Always a slide
And a slip. A flip, a stroke of her curves,
A lick for her nerves,
Her bosom rises,
To each one of my sensual prizes.
Flying fiery strands of gold around,
Together we lie amongst the ground,
Forever we fly, for we are the ether
The rhythm. Our dance to a beat
A beat built with instinct,
For a language so succinct,
Falling over the brink of joy,
Falling, moaning, longing for joining,
To be everlasting, outlasting.
There it is. Lying as at it always does upon our kitchen table, like a smug cat with a full stomach, gloating over its recent catch – its recent mess. And smell. My fathers pipe, the most disgusting thing ever to encroach itself on my house. I know I could outstare it if I tried – the grotesque pipe forever watching, laughing as it knows I cannot touch it. I would throw it out of the house once and for all. Taking its disgusting belly, so round, full of an evil ember, away from me for ever. But it knows, oh yes. It understands perfectly how my father would react should I snatch it from its lair. And as if anticipating my thoughts, it
What comes out of the dark
Is not disturbing, is what
Comes out in the night?
When all is dead and never right,
Can't you give up the fight?
You stake of nature,
Mistake of nature,
Mother of nature, you're a mistake
To make me appear in my room,
From the spiralling gloom,
As I write this, the moon
Shines forth in the sky.
But not tonight,
There is no light,
There is only darkness,
And only death.
Destruction comes forth ,
South, west, east, north…
You find my witterings,
My little wittleings,
My spirited tattling,
Disturbing, do you not?
Or have you forgot,
What makes things spin,
Spin spin spin spin sin sin sin,
Spi
Thrice struck the hammer upon the skin drum
Thrice the crow screeched that the death deed had been done.
In the grave of the living, the dead walked on,
Where the din of the ravens drowns the nightingale song.
The cruel priests repeated their chant,
Over and over that their wish might be grant,
Prowling round a cauldron of fire,
The death monks summoned a wish from their sire.
The cauldron of flame turned a tinge of red
Whilst a fresh bloodied corpse was brought in to be fed.
In the grave of the living where the dead sing their song,
A demon had left hell and was now shortly gone.
As blood spilled into their cauldron of flame,
It
She screamed, her voice piercing the night,
Around her the world was far from right,
She stumbled and ran, but the flames rose up high
She ran on, not wanting to die.
And yet as a being rose behind her she knew,
That there was no escape from these winds that blew
From the deepest darkest caverns, the pit without finish,
The abyss, a lovers missed kiss – No hope no desperate wish.
'Keep going, don't stop, don't forget who you are,
Think of water, of love, of the brightest star,
Never go down, always aim t'wards the skies
Don't think of the deceit, the vengeance and lies'
And yet the wind blew about her and captured her mind,
Until
Blue and black
were always your weapons of choice--
the most beautiful way
to beat my soul
and hide the scars from everyone.
It's alright now, she told me,
Calm down; don't fight now.
Jesus preached to turn the other cheek...
Drunken nights and empty promises
were always your weapons of choice.
Oh, how I wish you would
truly make me bleed to show
the scars to everyone.
It's alright now, she told me,
Calm down; don't fight now.
Jesus preached to turn the other cheek...
Daddy, you must have loved your
little girl so much.
You crushed her wings,
blew out her light,
broke her heart, and
stopped its beating every night
bef
He painted her world
in beautiful colors,
[Her life] his canvas,
[Her love] his paint…
Vibrant shades of red and gold--
golden sunsets
against vanilla skies;
and soothing ocean
lullabies
He left his signature
in the corner of her heart,
written so small
the letters flowed through her veins
One day she found the canvas
blank
Her life in shades of endless greys
No shades of gold, green, or violet;
He erased her world away…
Her tears and words were lost forever
in the cracks of grey concrete
Alone to dry
against grey sunlight
Buried
in the grey underground
From her tears grew the lily,
[his last mast
Arg arg arg arg! So much horrible, horrible, horrible, awful, nasty, icky, gooey wubbish here!!
*sigh*
I shall try to put something more worthwhile up here :)
~Chris M^.^N
Ok so i'm typing stuff here because I'm at college and there's nothign to do! (apart from H'w but shhhhh) and im waiting for maths to begin and this is going to take another 15 minutes. So i'm outside on the cmoputer updating my journal!
Ok, life has changed i have to admit. And because this is my first ever journal entry i'll start with that; Life.
1) Life
2) I'd say i'm a typical boy whos grown up in a typical world. And typicaly this is probably not true. This is typical.
3) If i start talking about the world i wont stop so i wont start.
4) if you read some of my poetry, (which i suppose is why you are reading this,) you'll notic
I haven't said "hey" yet so i figure i must.
But i am lost for what to say...
My lack of imagination fills me with disgust!
Alas i shall have to settle with "how is one?" and "good day!"
Now, i can't saty here gathering dust,
I must be on my way!
i have never been compared to an angle before, acute or obtuse??
"only a jenny"!! i think tis better by the way.
and you will regret cursing me because now i am damaged. ... i blame u...